5. A Book

I slept later than intended this morning, set my alarm for the wrong time. Still, got to work on time. Hahaha.

Although I had full intentions of  making the most productive use of my days off, it didn’t really seem to happen yesterday. I enjoyed taking no responsibilities, eating shit tinned vegetable soup and doing nothing but read all day. Silly really because I think I am happiest when I pay close attention to the small duties of this fairly simple existence.

Occasionally I think of the vast task ahead of me and I am scared. It feels like a slow panic. At night, the windows of this house present terrible potentials in their blackness, but these fears are irrational and, as such, easily dismissed. This other fear is different. It comes accompanied with a sadness and worse: the fear of the depth that sadness could reach and of its possible longevity. That’s actually a quite verbose description of an emotion which is, in actuality, very rare and brief, so don’t worry!

Writing things like ‘don’t worry!’ feels ridiculous. It feels like arrogance to assume that anyone really is worrying, but various people have assured me they will be.

Today’s productivity came with ease facilitated mainly, I think, by the decision to experiment with a specific device. The bulk and core of this track is constructed of randomly selected and cut samples of guitar mapped onto a keyboard and then re-ordered/re-constructed/re-pitched etc.. The idea is to falsify an unawareness of tonality, to escape very conscious methods of constructing melody and harmony. It works to a degree. It allows a compositional process uninhibited by conventions or, indeed, by an evasion of those conventions. However, it seems to have manifest here with a slightly unprogressive and stagnant tonality, resulting in limited note melodies. Not to say I’m not pleased with track. In fact, not to say anything critical about the track at all, these are simply notable facts. Blablabla, here it is:

Atdaseesyd right click and ‘save as’

Here is a picture of my working space. Seems pertinent somehow, maybe you’re interested.Space

You can’t see the view in this picture, but out the window is the back garden, just grass really, leading up to two huts. In the corner at the end, not twenty metres away, is a gate opening onto steps that lead onto the sea-defence. When the tide is in, I am literally a stones throw from the water.

Today I climbed out onto a groyne and sat with the water directly underneath me. I would have got wet from the waves were the water not completely flat. I was tempted to swim and regret not doing so. Today has been the warmest since my arrival and I finished work early, prime opportunity.

All done. Bu-bye.


11 Responses to “5. A Book”

  1. Tasneem Says:

    This is my favourite track so far – really liked it. Still checking up on you every day!

  2. Guy Says:

    A pack of biscuits!!

  3. Dad Says:

    I think the music’s getting better every day – I can’t wait till day 40!
    Biscuits are standard working fuel, they’re obviously doing the job! I hope you’ve got 40 day’s worth.

  4. Jo Says:

    Amazing Yaseen, your music is the best it has been for me so far since meeting you. It’s much more honest some how, i’m sure this is because of the limited time to criticise/condem/back out/over think. This is really exciting for me. wow what a brilliant project. Perfect for you i feel.

    I just basically wrote an essay about how i feel about this project in relation to all art forms and then deleted it because i sounded pretentious, so i will e-mail it instead.

  5. zaynab Says:

    biscuits and books! lots of books.

    seeing the picture of your work space made me jealous. for all this talk of you potentially going mad, i think its actually a very healthy thing to be alone to create without distraction but, importantly, with a routine. i too wish to be cut off from the world for a while to just practice bass and read. and i know i wouldnt be able to do that if i allowed phones and internet and shops and people into the retreat. so well done.

  6. p hutch Says:

    I really like this, alot!

  7. Richard Says:

    very nice post, you write so well. And yes there are people,myself one of them, who worry about you friend. However if you continue as you are now then I have no fear for you my dear. Oh nice tunage too.

  8. Chris Says:

    Your vocal harmonies on this track remind me of Kings of Convenience today.

  9. Chris Says:

    Who’s MacBook is this by the way?

  10. Chris Says:

    OK, I keep coming back to this track.

    I know you must have a big list of people to call when you ‘get out’ and I’d really like to be on that list if you have space.. I miss seeing you.

  11. oftensong.com» Blog Archive » Brighton, More Apologies Says:

    […] https://isolationyas.wordpress.com/2009/10/19/5-a-book/ […]

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